Andreu Rieu the Kenny G of the Noughties

May 14, 2008

Who the fuck is this guy?! Where did he come from? Holland apparently – you have a lot to answer for! He appears out of nowhere and is now seen grinning like a ponce from every music store imaginable, in his tux, smarmy smile plastered to his face, violin in hand. This guy has to be the Kenny G or Yanni of the 00’s. He is so lame. I have decided you all must be punished out there on the internets.

Here is Adreu Rieu (get a real name you twit), playing Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On. This must be on permanent rotation in Hell, or what’s scarier Heaven. All the Mom’s love him, though. Something must be done to stop Andreu Rieu! Suggestions?

5 Responses to “Andreu Rieu the Kenny G of the Noughties”

  1. syms said

    I suggest listening to the Irish entry for Eurovision 2008 and you will be rendered speechless – Andreu Rieu has got nothing on Dustin the Turkey.

    From this article:

    He’s released 14 singles and six albums in Ireland. His last offering, 2005’s Bling When You’re Minging, featured a duet with Chris de Burgh.

    Dustin has also sung with Live Aid legend Sir Bob Geldof, who is backing his puppet pal’s Eurovision bid.

    Geldof said: “Dustin is one of the greatest talents this country has ever produced. The mere fact that he is a turkey should give Ireland the edge.”

    And here is the clip; it will change your life:

  2. Greg Maxwell said

    Aieeee, My ears!!!!!!
    Kill him, kill him now.
    Is there such a thing as a musical fatwa?
    Never mind old Salman and his Satanic verses, this is Satanic Strings. Pure musical blasphemy. My Thrill Kill Cult album just spontaneously combusted!!!!
    Yes Rich, I still have it.

  3. Greg Maxwell said

    Heavens above Rich, even Andrew Bolt agrees with you. When Bolt thinks it’s bland, it must me one step more tasteless than vanilla. Time to take a slightly more extreme position.

    “I guess he’s offering not just schmaltz – always popular, and reassuring – but utterly safe and undeniably tuneful music of the kind that pleases people who want to feel civilised, even cultured, without their brain hurting. These are people who want to feel connected again to the chocolate-box culture that produced a Johann Strauss without them quite knowing who the hell he was. Or they simply want to feel connected to Western culture at its most ideally benign. “

  4. H-J.Cyrull said

    You people are utter idiots, you think the music of this era is something worth listening too? It is nothing but garbage, only industrial noise. You must be brain dead.
    Because you say this crap about Andreu Rieu you must have smoked to much grass. The music that he plays is worth listening to .
    Something should be done about idiots like you.

  5. richard777 said

    Classical music is great and I can appreciate a dislike of modern pop and rock music, though i disagree with it.

    But, AR is a schmaltzy bad classical musician. Sorry, its what I think…

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